Do Women Even Know What THEY Want In a Guy or Relationship?

Ok - first off, I know I have not written on this blog for quite some time now and that I have used it for mainly gaming related topics. I felt the need to type all this out and write it on here for the time being just to see where it goes.

Let me start off by saying, not all women are "nuts", not all of them are "crazy hypocritical" beings. For the most part, women are great to be around and have as friends. Though something always tends to change when you wish to take things to another level. Almost like, reverse evolution.

I am only one guy, and this is just my take and perspective on it. I know there are going to be those who come and and say it's not true, or that I'm right, or a multitude of other things. Just remember, this is my blog, my entry, and my opinion. If you don't like it, express your opinion in a manner that is not "off the chain". Be civil basically. Now back to the entry I was writing.

Many times in the dealings with women I have, or have had (even if they are scarcely limited) I have always found it interesting how when the time comes around to present itself to move on to the next level, a lot of the times the woman (or girl (due to their childish nature)) involved, tends to always put you (me) into what is now known as "the friend zone" (name coming from popular internet memes).

After long talks with some of my closer female friends, we've all come to the conclusion that this is usually due to said female being quite immature for their age, and that the thought of being in a serious relationship scares them, and because it is easier to drive off male companions and then find a new one to be with the next day.

It may also be highly probable to say that even though these girls (again calling them this due to lack of maturity) only wish to have a guy around to pretty much "pay their way". For those of you who have ever attempted the "bar scene" you will know what I'm talking about. A good looking gal will come up to you and flirt you up for awhile, putting all these lil thoughts into your head (and not the one you think with). She'll do this for awhile, then maybe order a drink (which somehow you end up paying for). Then once she gets the stuff she wants out of ya, dinner, drinks, whatever - she's gone. She will usually say she has to use the rest room, or she'll have another female friend with her who makes up some bullshit story so both of them leave.

I like to think of this as the "female wingman theory". They know your limits, but you're too drunk off your ass to care. You think there might be a chance of getting laid tonight. Nope, there never was! Even so, you get sucked right into this game and play along like a puppet on strings. Yet you wonder why ya didn't get your chance.

This goes back to the females being immature for their age as it were. If you notice all the younger girls at the bars tend to play this game on you more so than those closer to your age group or over it. And again, they are younger for a reason (both in age and maturity level). In my case now a days, I find myself getting "hit on" by older women more so than the younger ones. I try not to find reasons to take things seriously unless opportunities arise with the older (than me) ladies out there. This is because a lot of times it is more playful flirting that is involved with them rather than straight up "sexual" flirting.

Now - I'm sure if you have female friends on things like Facebook, you'll notice statuses popping up from time to time like "Why are all guys assholes", "Why can't I ever find a nice guy to be with", and so on. My feeling on this subject are thus:

1. You can't find a nice guy cause you treat the nice guys like shit and take advantage of them to buy you thinks, and then just kick them to the curb.

2. All guys aren't assholes, the guys you are hanging out with and dating might be. There might be a logical explanation for this if you decided to take the time to find out why they are like that.

3. *This is for the guys* Not all women are bitches. Though they will be if you treat them like that.

4. *This is for the gals* If you want to be with a nice guy, stop treating him like shit and making him become an asshole. Chances are he was a nice guy when you first started dating, but you helped convert him into the asshole you dislike.

It is simple common sense people, if you don't want to be treated like shit, stop treating others like shit and then complaining about it. Otherwise you'll always end up having shitty relationships.

It is called a relationship because it involves at minimum two people. If you don't want to find out why your significant other is in a down mood, why they are upset, you're gonna have a bad relationship with that person. If you don't communicate with them on maters like treating you negatively, hurting your feelings, or doing things that make you upset. THE RELATIONSHIP IS NOT GOING TO WORK. Do you see a pattern here yet? I do.

You might ask, what right do I have to judge these things. I will answer simply - I have been in these situations. And I always wind up asking myself, was it me, was it something I did? Is it my personality or my (lack of) good looks? And I know the answer deep down. I've been in situations were I fumbled the ball and things I did were my own undoing. Only difference is, when that happens - I don't ask those question to myself. That's because I KNOW what I did wrong and have no reason to search for an answer.

In part, I'm attracted to intelligence in women. I like to feel like I have some sort of common ground connection with someone I'd like to be with. I'm sure all of us want to feel like we have a connection with those we are with and love and care about. Though - I tend to find myself (when in these situations) trying to "force" things sometimes. As you know - that never works. Forcing your views onto others just isn't a good idea in general. Would you change who you are to be with someone, when in the end you won't be happy because you changed your fundamental core beliefs and values? No, you probably wouldn't do that.

You know - you don't have to be with the best looking girl on the block. You need to find someone who is right for the type of person you are, and the type of person who enjoys the same activities or hobbies you do. If you truly love or like a girl for who she is, then what else matters? Everything else is secondary. Find someone who can be your friend and someone you can love, all at the same time. It might sound sappy, but it helps.

Right now - I think this is where I am going to end this rant for now. I mainly wrote those so that later on in the future *I* can come back and look at it, and just remember that I know these things. Then I won't have to wonder why XYZ happened the way it did. And on the off chance this helps someone in the end other than myself, no thanks needed. Be happy you found someone who is right for you.

Anyways - this is where I sign off. See you all on the flip side. Cheers!

~SV